A miscommunication and friends' busy lives left me alone on my night in Chicago for work a couple weeks ago. I was pretty disappointed about plans falling through, (and I had no one to go out with), so I set out to just buy a quick sandwich and settle in to watch tv and do some work.
As I strolled the city blocks looking for a panini to grab and take back to my hotel room, I realized how uncomfortable I am in a big city--especially one that should be more familiar than it is. (I lived most of my life 30 miles outside of Chicago!)
It's fun, exciting, and busy when you're with company, but the big city can be lonely when you're alone.
After I finished my pity walk, I started to appreciate my surroundings. People watching and musing; making up little stories for the lives of those of whom I only catch a brief glimpse. (am I the only one that does this?) The distracted dog walker becomes a busy mom taking her opportunity to get out and enjoy the night. The well-dressed girls, a group of surgeons at a medical conference ready to hit the town after a long day of neuro-lectures. The confident bicyclist weaving in and out of traffic, a finance guy heading home; the hipster jamming to his tunes at Starbucks, an aspiring novelist.
And I, am whoever I want to be. (though, certainly--not a tourist. I left my camera in purse to prove this point. All the photos were taken earlier in the day, or later from my hotel window). I am more confident, more friendly, more of everything I wish I'd be with people who really know me.
There's a part of me that loves the anonymity and distance--it's an escape for you and everyone around you.
But a part of me misses and loves the small town I grew up in. You can so easily get swallowed up in a city. I miss the slower pace, the unfeigned friendliness, the simpler life.
Although I doubt I'll ever live the city life, I love living near cities (Chicago, now San Diego). I can see myself settling in suburbia, or maybe in a smaller city. (LA, Chicago, New York are just so huge!)
Are you a city girl or country girl at heart? What do you love about where you live now?
Are you a city girl or country girl at heart? What do you love about where you live now?
